“Balance” for me honestly is like one of my favorite songs I’ve dropped. Behind all of my music, I tend to have a message behind it. There’s a saying, “There’s two wolves that live inside you and the one that wins is the one you feed.” For me, I think in order for us to be authentically ourselves, it’s important to have a balance between the two. I don’t think one necessarily wins over the other if you’re in the right balance in life. I try to hide some messages behind the bars as much as I can because I’m a real big believer in the law of attraction and manifesting your destiny and manifesting your own success and I feel like having balance in life is definitely a big part in that.
I like to share positivity with my fans because I’ve been down and out before. I’ve seen rock bottom. I feel like a majority of people have hit rock bottom more than one time in their life. I feel like when that happens, it’s key to believe in yourself, but when you don’t have that, it’s really great to have somebody believe in you or kinda help you out of the hole.
For me, I always wanted my music to be that for somebody. Music has always held me together and I just figured it would be the same for other people. So when I started making music, my overall intention wasn’t to just inspire and motivate people, I was really just telling my own story from my own perspective, and then along the way, I realized how many people it was affecting in a positive way and just continued down that path.
I got into a car accident back in 2016. I couldn’t walk for two years. Anytime you go through something crazy like that in your life, I feel like we all have moments of doubt and we kinda like go back and forth between having doubt and faith sometimes. Sometimes it’s not like overall doubt for six months and then six months later, you’re super confident. It comes in rushes and waves. I had just released my first album like a month before that happened, so everything was just happening really, really fast for me. It was definitely devastating.
I never went unconscious or anything like that, but funny story, when I was in the car, something told me to take my watch off. To this day, I know it was God, something told me, "Oh take your watch off and put it in the passenger’s seat.” When I did that, the airbag flew past my face. So you know, the airbag could have burnt my face or broke my nose or something like that. That moment right there for me was just letting me know, you’re here for a reason.
Anything is going to try to take you out in life and the most important thing you can do is keep going. Because things are going to happen. Of course it was a crazy experience because my doctors were telling me they weren’t sure if I was ever going to walk again. Six months turned into a year, turned into two years. I share the story of my journey relearning how to walk in the video for "Recognize." I wouldn’t be who I am without those moments. Without those moments of doubt, I wouldn’t have the confidence to be who I am today.
And even though I’ve been through a lot, there’s a lot going on today. I feel like everything definitely affects me. I’m a Pisces. I feel the whole entire world, even when I don’t wanna feel it. Let’s just start with quarantine, the crazy thing about being locked in a house for this long is that I’ve done this before. I really couldn’t walk for two years, so this almost feels like the same thing, except everybody’s going through it with me this time. So I feel like I’ve got a little bit of wisdom in that arena.
As far as everything that happened with the Black Lives Matter movement and all of the Black people that we’ve lost, definitely that hit home for me. I made a music video to my song “Lift Me Up” and made an acoustic version dedicated to the movement. I was out there at the protests and the rallies and for me, being Black isn’t a trend. It’s something that I will be for the rest of my life and I’ve been since I was born. So things like that happening in life in America are always going to affect me. But at the same time, I feel like some things like that, they foster great change and great positivity in the end.
We have to keep fighting for the movement and keep fostering these changes so that change can happen in America. And it starts with us. The cool thing — I don’t want to say the “cool” thing — but, the good thing about all of this happening is the awareness that it brought to situations like this and how deeply everybody felt it, especially being in quarantine, I think we all felt it even more because we’re sitting home and really have to live this and understand it on a deeper level versus being desensitized to going places 9-5 or just being all over the place. We really had time to sit down and evaluate the things that were happening. I’m super happy that people are starting to wake up to the injustice that lives in America and are starting to make changes to eradicate those things.
Sometimes you gotta travel through the storm to get to the sunshine. So for some reason, I have a gut feeling that we’re going to wind up ending in a better position than we were in before. I just try to keep my head up and think about it that way.
What keeps me going even in pits of doubt is knowing that you’re always exactly where you’re supposed to be. Everything is a lesson that God would have you learn and if you’re in a certain predicament, I feel like it’s always for a reason. I wouldn’t be able to appreciate the sunshine if it wasn’t for rain. It all coincides with having that balance in life.
Sometimes the things that we deem negative, two, three, four years down the line wind up being like the most positively impactful things in our life. So sometimes, we’ve kinda gotta take a step back and keep a bird’s eye view as much as we can because life is all about balance. It’s all about valleys and peaks and just getting through them. Somebody told me that success is going from failure to failure without losing enthusiasm and I’ve always lived by that.
At the end of the day like I said before, we all can’t see the bird’s eye view of seeing through God’s eyes of why everything happens. There’s so many things that happen on a daily basis that aren’t even news that are devastating and we wonder why these things happen. I happen to think that they’re all working for a bigger purpose. That doesn’t take away from the pain, the agony and the hurt that we all felt when these things occur. I still live with that pain and that hurt.
But you know how like if you’re upset about something, something deep in your soul tells you you’re going to be ok? Even though you’re upset? I think that’s just generally how I feel about it. Something in the pit of my stomach is letting me know that we’re going to end up in a better situation. But it definitely doesn’t take away from all of the negative emotions that come with it. Again, it’s all about that balance. I feel like life is playing some weird balance beam that we really don’t or won’t understand fully until… I have no idea when we’re going to understand it. I just feel like there’s a bigger picture.
Listen to "Balance" below and watch the official music video
and lyric video above.